Definition of Jaded: tired, bored, or lacking enthusiasm, typically after having had too much of something.
This word came to me today: Jaded. I then looked up the definition and honestly I felt a sense of peace that this word described exactly what my heart was feeling in this season of my life. My heart was so overwhelmed and blessed with the fact that Holy Spirit would give me a word that described exactly how I felt, because The Lord is the One who understands me the most.
Tired, bored, lacking enthusiasm…so many good things are happening but sometimes I’m not convinced that this time will be any different or that things will change. When we have a jaded heart a turn in the road for the better can seem like a pit in the valley, or we feel like someone is dangling false hope right before our eyes.
We lose our joyful anticipation of anything good, we lose our hope.
When we’ve had too much disappointment, or too much loss, it’s difficult to hope for something different. It’s hard to look for the light at the end of the tunnel. The enemy takes all that is good and convinces us that it’s really bad. We question all the blessings the Lord has brought before us, or we feel the fruit we are seeing in our life is just not enough, or it doesn’t really matter.
My heart was jaded until I realized that I was placing my hope in the wrong things. All that was temporary had replaced all that was eternal in my heart. My thoughts and my motives were being influenced by the temporary things of this world instead of the eternal desires of my heart.
It’s not easy to be in a place where your faith, hope, and love are tested. It’s not easy to move past the hurts and disappointments of this life. But honestly, right now, I am thankful for it. I know I am not a perfect Christian, but there was a time when I truly thought I was pretty darn close. I am thankful that everyday the Lord breaks down my pride, and through the disappointments and the grief, I have had to ask God the tough questions, and He has always been faithful to respond.
Yes, my heart is a little jaded towards the things that are truly temporary. But in this I have also learned how amazing Jesus is, and that truly this world cannot offer me the hope that He does.
I truly pray that if you are feeling even a little jaded right now that the Lord will revive your heart. I pray that you will be able to move past the temporary and SEE the eternal, and work towards storing up treasures in heaven. It’s not going to be easy, and it will require letting go of all you may feel gives you a purpose, but it’s truly worth it.