As my husband handed my two youngest children’s birth certificates and social security cards to the receptionist, I wanted to snatch those two pieces of paper up and yell, “NO! They’re my babies! You can’t have them!”, and then run out of there as fast as I could!
I know that may sound crazy, but at the time I truly felt like I was handing them over to someone else. You see they have been somewhat homeschooled since they were in Kindergarten. Even though my two little ones are 16 months apart, I started homeschooling my youngest daughter with her brother when he started kindergarten. They are both now in the fourth grade.
Last year we enrolled them into a blended charter school where they went to a learning center two days a week and then were home three days a week. It took so much FAITH to let them go. All I could think about was how it would be so much easier if I just kept them home with me. That fear made me realize that this school was where they needed to be.
Over the last 21 days of prayer and fasting our church did I was intently praying about their education. Finally God confirmed to me the fear I had about putting them into public school, and He gently encouraged me that it was TIME to release that fear, and to enroll them into our local public school.
It’s been such a journey, and one filled with a lot of turmoil and pain, including the scene I mentioned at the beginning of this article.
You see, faith refined means releasing ANY and ALL fear that might be living in your heart.
FAITH takes TRUST and sometimes it’s just plain HARD to trust anyone, even God.
So now we prepare for the journey ahead. The journey where my two babies will be in school FULL time, away from me. I know one thing I will be doing a whole lot more, I will be praying for them even more than I do now. I will be sitting at the feet of Jesus, even more than I do now.
I will have TIME on my hands, and I trust God will fill it up with His kingdom purpose. I trust that my children will be a light shining for Jesus in a very dark world.
I have an author friend who said, “The faith walk isn’t a cake walk.” Isn’t that the TRUTH!
Truth & trust, just two things we undervalue in this world. I cling to His truth and I trust that His plan is GOOD, that’s my journey today and everyday…it’s where my hope lives.
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