Often whenever there is resistance to something in my life it causes me to stumble. My usual reaction is to fall back and not even try to move forward. To say that perseverance is not one of my greatest qualities would be an understatement.
I guess my first reaction to resistance is hopelessness, that’s where I stumble. In my mind the resistance is just too difficult to push through because it does take perseverance. Perseverance takes hope, and when you feel hopeless you do not feel like persevering.
Often when I am looking to change something about my life it becomes this game of trying to figure out how to overcome this stumbling block of mine.
What do I do when forces out of my control cause me to be late for an appointment?
What do I do when there seems to be hostility towards me from those I work with and go to church with?
What if the hostility comes from my family and friends?
What do I do when my children are misbehaving and I just want to take a nap?
What do we do in these difficult situations where it feels like we are working against the currents of life instead of “going with the flow?”
When I want to make a change, in my heart I know I want things to change and to get better, it is even simple to see what my next steps might be. However, finding the strength to move forward with what I know to be true in my heart and mind just isn’t that easy, especially if there is some sort of resistance in my life.
That’s why I know that I need to take small steps in the right direction and sometimes those movements will be met with a lot, or maybe even a little bit of resistance.
Recently I started attending college, this was a big step for me personally. One of the obstacles I had to overcome was my own resistance to accepting that the seasons of my life were changing. I just wanted my children to be home with me like they were when they were babies and toddlers. The resistance in my heart to take a step forward was simply because I wanted to live in the past.
As a mom, thinking about your children’s future as independent adults is both exciting and terrifying. Sometimes moving forward with letting them go out into the world requires one shift in perspective: that’s to cling to the hope and excitement that the future holds for them. One I learned this I was able to move past the resistance in my own heart and I decided to finally go to college.
One baby step at a time, and I was finally on my way to school! I remember my first day of college my youngest asked me if I was going to still write books now that I was going to college and I was going to “get a job.” I assured her that I most definitely was going to still write books, but this statement still triggered a moment of doubt and resistance in my heart towards going to college.
I know that I do not want to stop writing books. It was a moment when I didn’t want to move forward with my new plan because maybe it would mean giving up something that I love to do.
Resistance doesn’t always come dressed up as doubt, discouragement, or hostility. Sometimes it can look appealing and may even look like you are suffering for the “right things.”
Plus, overcoming one resistance block (not wanting to let go of a past season) just leads to overcoming another resistance block (not wanting to put my writing on the “back burner”.)
To my surprise college hasn’t made me have to put my writing on the “back burner”, in fact it has helped to boost my confidence a little in the writing department, and also in my faith in God.
Every time I overcome resistance my confidence gets stronger, and I am able to persevere against resistance even more!
Maybe overcoming the stumbling block of resistance requires not only perseverance, but also letting go. Sometimes we think perseverance is about maintaining our pace, but sometimes it truly is throwing off whatever it is that is weighing us down, like our past and our doubts.
It’s not easy to admit your weakness but where I am weak HE is strong. Even though I would rather not persevere, God gives me the strength to move past those stumbling blocks and I think that is reflected in my life.
Perseverance is not one of my best qualities, but God’s strength encourages me to never give up.
My husband often tells my youngest daughter that she is stronger than she thinks she is.
Sometimes we are stronger, smarter, and braver than we think we are.
Even though resistance is my stumbling block, and perseverance is where I am weak, I would say that is the area I am strongest because that is where God has been able to take over my life completely. If it weren’t for God I wouldn’t be where I am today. Our stumbling blocks can actually be a gift when we surrender our brokenness to HIM!
I will say though, that the more I walk this journey with THE LORD, the more I realize that I persevere a lot more than I had once thought. But of course that’s probably because I am relying on THE LORD in this process.
Resistance is my stumbling block, and through God, perseverance is where I am strong.